Almost everyone has experience with a person, co-worker, manager etc. who takes every opportunity to tell how busy he or she is, complains about it all the time, repeating the same over and over again, talks a lot (while in that time he or she could have done another task of the never ending list) and is overall a stressed being. If you do any suggestions to improve that person’s situation you receive defensive words, but you realise this unfriendly response comes from pure stress.
After a while you come to the conclusion he or she isn’t open to get any supporting advice on board as he or she knows everything best, so you decide to leave that person alone. Unfortunately, in the meantime, you feel the negative energy when he or she is around. And because that suffering person knows everything best, he or she is arrogant and you always disliked an arrogant attitude.
Troubles in paradise?
I guess, we all have known or know such a person, who more less fits this description. At work maybe. At school. Or, perhaps closer, within our families. But in paradise we don’t expect that, do we? In paradise should be peace of mind, interest in each other, positivity, enjoyment and gratitude of the beauty around us, respect, empathy and love, but not people walking around heavily stressed, worrying about everything and who expect us to do the same.
I see it as an exercise to stay calm and positive and don’t let it interfere my feelings of happiness. I have changed my attitude or, to be honest, still in the process of doing so. It’s that person’s hell, not mine. Still, I know this person hasn’t a bad heart, but a difficult one and demanding much of others in the ambition to change the world. And it’s never good enough what someone is doing.
The grass is greener..
Not even in paradise people can let go of their egos, tensions and problems, which are mostly self-imposed. Just as deceptive as we think we have found the perfect, caring lover and after a while he appears to be a dominant asshole who lacks any empathy. Or we have found the ultimate job, but every morning we have to beat the traffic jams to get to our office and in the evenings when we go home after a long day. Or in my situation, to move to a new place to live a sustainable, simple and slow life, but it’s here too where I observe that busyness and stress are seen as a status symbol by the person who started this sustainable environment, which is completely opposite to its philosophy that propagates love and respect for mother earth. It’s interesting to observe this is a choice and probably born from the deep desire to be seen and acknowledged. Without this human interference, this place is a true paradise. Really.
No sustainable relationship
We talk about a sustainable lifestyle when we’re discussing energy, food, shelter, water, nature, consumption, time, but what about relationships and people? Isn’t this ironic, to be surrounded by someone who only focuses on themselves and what they want and speak about sustainable living, isn’t sustainable. It isn’t a sustainable relationship or a sustainable friendship. To have a sustainable relationship we need mutual respect, connection, communication and caring. And we need empathy.
Change oneself first, before start changing the world. If not, it’s all lies.
I came across this TED-talk with a sustainable message by poet Cleo Wade that could be of benefit to keep a positive mind and attitude when the world/someone is telling you otherwise.