(Eco) Confessions.

Ever doubt your goals or what you strongly believe in, works or is actually true?

We are evolving beings and ideas we had before can change over time. Because we have accumulated more knowledge and experience or our priorities in life have simply shifted. 

I love the tiny house lifestyle: to live on a small surface area, off-grid, sustainable, debt-free. You know, these small, cute houses you see on the internet, videos on social media, all very Instagrammable. All looks just perfect and the owners are happy people, telling in front of the camera how they built the place, and how they enjoy their free life, as there’s no more mortgage to pay. You know that Everybody Loves The Sunshine kinda atmosphere. 

Broken glass

Truth is, living tiny isn’t always sunshine and reggae. A pan I don’t know where to store, so I put it just quickly on the floor while cooking dinner. A broken glass that fell of the kitchen counter, as it is actually too small to do the dishes well. Actually I need to wash up every time after I have used cups and plates. Clothes I store in big boxes under the bed. Not having a generous fridge. 

But also true, our converted shed (into a tiny home) is still in progress and not finished yet. Dorus will make cupboards in the kitchen part to store all our jars with dry food (oats, chickpeas, beans etc) and installs sockets in the walls, etc. 

Carpenters’ homes are always full with jobs to fix, but the carpenter is often too busy with other people’s homes. They say, patience is a virtue, right? Is it wrong to just want things NOW? 

Green Gorillas

It doesn’t make any difference though, as Dorus is just completely occupied by other projects at the moment, such as our Green Gorillas project.

We both put a lot of time, money and effort in this project and some weeks ago I was about to give up, as I see hardly any revenues (bookings for our Eco courses). That isn’t surprising as we are still in the midst of Covid. This virus and restrictions don’t seem to end. Of course, these times aren’t the easiest to earn money with something you believe in. 

Therefore I decided not to give up. It’s too early to draw conclusions. It both excites me (what if it truly works and we get dozens of bookings?) and worries me (what if after two years we still have too few bookings?)

@navigateontrust on Instagram

My dream

It’s funny; a girl commented to one of our posts on Instagram “you guys are living the dream”. The truth is, my ultimate dream is to write. And I must not forget about this. Writing came last these past weeks. Last, as it didn’t happen at all.

Also because at times I struggle with myself and everything I do, goes with lots of effort. Truly nothing is effortless and goes smoothly then. It’s like I have to move mountains, just to achieve some small, stupid things, such as buying a watering can for the plants. Once a month I have these struggling times with a body that hurts and moods that swing rock hard. I have come to the conclusion it’s PMS. I am very lucky I have a man who’s understanding and sweet on those bad days and makes me cups of herbal tea.

Amazon

For years I took evening primrose oil tablets each day to relieve these ailments. I haven’t took them since we moved to Mallorca. Lately Amazon is my rescue for things I can’t buy in and around this village. Not particularly ecological and supportive of the small and local businesses. But so practical — and lazy. Amazon sends it to the post office in the village and I get a notification as soon as it arrives. So evening primrose oil tablets I’m about to order. It always takes a few months before the effects are noticeable (less belly cramps, less mood swings).

Flow

Yes, I’m going to dedicate more time to write, because that really puts a smile on my face. Only as I write I feel moments of flow, these timeless moments. Aliveness it is. Pure energy. Why wasn’t I listening better?

What are your (eco) confessions? 

Con Amor,

Eva 

Photo by Luke Stackpoole/Unsplash

It’s That Simple: Near the Sea we Should be Free.

“Doesn’t it seem to you,” asked Madame Bovary, “that the mind moves more freely in the presence of that boundless expanse, that the sight of it elevates the soul and gives rise to thoughts of the infinite and the ideal?”

Gustave Flaubert

Last Sunday I visited the sea, a dreamy small cove, enclosed by high rocks without a far view on the Mediterranean. This somewhat hidden beach feels like a well-kept secret, but the amount of people and the signs “playa cala Pi” tell me it’s far from that. Yet, as soon as I descend the long stairs, surrounded by rocks and trees, some happy changes are happening in my overthinking head.  

A few people were wearing masks to protect themselves from Covid-19 that’s still flying around.

They have forgotten the sea is about freedom.

When we are near the sea we breathe in the fresh air. We taste our salty lips. We stick our toes in the sand and we expose our tired and pale skin to the summer sun. 

There’s no need to mull it over. The sea is about leaving our worries behind. The sea is about being playful, just like the seagulls soaring above the beach, effortless and cheeky, always on the hunt for a lost little snack. Heaviness doesn’t exist near the sea, only a breezy air full of possibilities and dreams live here. 

The sea teaches us that nothing lasts forever, not even this lazy Sunday afternoon in this magical cove that I don’t want to end, but will fade away as soon as the sun disappears behind the rocks. The good thing is, I can come back to this. I live on an island, so the sea will always be there. Coming back resets my mind.

Not long ago I woke up each morning with sea-sounds and chatty seagulls. I enjoyed every minute of it and over the years I have experienced the sea is both whimsical and steady. In summer she was bubbly, refreshing and vibrant. In winter, when all people where gone, she was mystical and moody at times. She could rage ferociously with waves reaching to the end of the beach, almost impossible to walk without having wet shoes and ankles. I loved to be her witness on such moments, safely from my window, or, if I dared to come closer, with wet feet in the sand, watching the pulling and pushing force of the water. 

The storms above sea were spectacular, I saw them coming in, looming on the horizon, when they were still miles away, already announcing themselves. The dark and heavy clouds and rain approaching from above sea until raindrops were finally tapping on my window.

Read this story that takes you to the sea, here.💙

Con Amor,

Eva

October mood

We’re already landed in October! I haven’t written much on this blog lately. Not that I don’t know what to write, but it’s evident that I have been quite lethargic lately, I still am a bit to be honest. Last two weeks I had ennoying belly-problems, it’s not over completely. Lost weight. My new shorts are hanging loose around my butt. I’m giving the intestines and belly some rest now. No more vinos for the time being, that’s for sure.

When you don’t feel that great physically, you surely don’t feel exactly on top of the world either. In order to not losing the magic here I biked to “El Mirador” of “Es Vèdra” last Saturday (what can be a greater remedy against apathy than some good exercise?!). From here you have a beautiful lookout and view at the world’s third most energetic point “Es Vèdra”: Huge rocks risen from the bottom of the Mediterranean sea. Looking at it I see the shape of a sleeping dragon. Some say this island of solely rocks is the heritage of Atlantis, the mythical and lost island. Not a single soul lives here. Probably another reason why it fascinates so many people. So mystical rocks of Es Vèdra, give me a shot of energy and amazing magic please?

I started to feel more energetic again, that was easy (!), but it didn’t last very long. After I came home, sweaty from the bikeride, and had a shower my eyes became heavier and heavier and so I ended falling asleep for an hour or so. But it was all good and the mystical sleeping dragon is still here with me.

I may have not blogged for a while, but I do write a little almost every day. A poem, some phrases and thoughts. Most you can find here: Silentsouldiers poetry Ibiza . I’ve noticed that writing about how I feel really helps to find more peace with myself. After I write some lines and lay my pen down I truly start to feel better. Because I give my thoughts a life and don’t keep it in my head all the time. So here’s another reason to write! After all, you have to make your own happiness. How much love and sun, how much fortune and how many caring, sweet people you have in your life, it can’t always save you. It enriches your life, absolutely yes, but the only person in the world who can save you, is you.

Con Amor,

Eva

gregory-colbert_bigcat_silentsouldiers-poetry-ibiza_evalunes

The stillness of Ibiza winter

Ibiza Summer is in full swing, it has that great dynamics and vibrant atmosphere, but it’s also damn busy with loads of tourists and cars. A few days ago I walked in the hills near our home and only one runner (you must be crazy running with the sun burning on your sweaty skin!) passed by. It’s simply beautiful to walk on the small paths where you çan hear the singing of birds and the noise of crickets. Only that. Now and then I passed a casa de payés hidden in the hills.

Suddenly a longing for winter came up as it is my favourite time on the island. Winters here are magical. It’s in the skies, the sunlight, the weather (soft and sunny!), the lonely beaches, the tourists who have returned to their homes… It’s just peaceful here.

Oh no, nothing wrong with Summer on Ibiza. In a certain way I like the business and liveliness the many people bring to the island when they spend their holidays here, all the nice chiringuito’s, bars and restaurants that are open. However, I can’t help thinking of winter now and then. I really look forward to it. Such a great expectation. I’m feeling blessed by the thought of it… Magical Winter with your breathtaking sunsets.. It feels home to me.

First we’ll have some Summer holiday celebrations with family that visits the island tonight. We already have had a nice week with Dorus nephews and niece. Yesterday Heidi, our beloved ex-neighbour and philosopher from Amsterdam, dropped by with her partner to see us in our little paradise. So great to have seen her again! She told us about her plans to write a book. Of course it must be about philosophy, intersectional feminism, activism…The topics she’s so passionate about. Immediately I spoke with her about winters on Ibiza. The tranquility it breathes…

A perfect time, a perfect place to write that book!

 

 

 

 

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