Good Byes and New Beginnings.

I prefer to see the good in perhaps not the best experiences and in people who have shown their true colors. Also after working for opportunistic company owners on Ibiza whose only interests were money and image. Even when living in an ecological community where only one person, who lacks empathy and makes all decisions, is supposed to have worries. Yet, I prefer to see the good in people. After I left my legal career behind and we moved to Ibiza to experience more freedom and authenticity, I know there isn’t much of a difference with the “real world”. I maybe live in a bubble, the negative aspects of humanity are still present in this beautiful, green valley: vanity, distrust, disharmony, to name a few. I stopped trying and I keep myself on a healthy distance.

I won’t be giving my kindness to people anymore who actually don’t give a damn or try to know them better when they show little interest. It’s no longer a one way show. Time is precious. Often my intuitive voice already knows from the beginning.

Cheffing

Luckily each of my fellow community members and most of the volunteers who come and go are wonderful people. Our 2 Week Workshop “Sustainable Living”, instructed by Dorus, has just finished. I did most of the cooking these weeks. Two workshops were hosted by a plant-based chef and a vegan coach. It’s super interesting to learn about the environmental impact of our food choices and I’ve learned also that cooking for a big group every single day isn’t my passion. Those unstoppable chefs out there have truly gained my respect!

Mallorca

Our tiny home life and sustainable living adventure will be continued in another setting. It’s time we’re going to start our own little centre and community where we are free to shape it in the way we believe it should be, where Dorus teaches the Sustainable Living Courses, together with those who care. And to make this happen, we have decided to move to Mallorca, Ibiza’s big sister, the end of this year. A new beginning is waiting for us!

Sometimes I’m pondering why I can’t just live a “normal life” with a “normal house” and a “normal job”? Why this minimalistic, ecological way of life? When I was in Amsterdam for a short visit some weeks ago I felt so at home. For the first time in five years an uneasy, deep melancholic feeling overwhelmed me when I was back on Ibiza. I felt a longing to this place which I left five years ago. During this visit I had immersed myself in its energy, the small streets, the people sitting at terraces, the freedom it breathes, the cyclists everywhere, the warmth of my family and friends living there and I remembered all over again why I fell in love with Amsterdam many years ago. It felt ordinary and familiar and happy.

But here on this island I feel at home and mostly happy too and somehow it asks of me to head off the beaten track, to live a slower life which is more in harmony with nature, also because it’s possible here. To simplify. With a focus on “to be” rather than “to do” all day.

We will have to build our home and community on Mallorca and, of course, a vegetable garden to grow our own food. There’s definitely a lot “to do”. It will be a journey and it will be a risk. It will be uncomfortable and an opportunity to grow.

Community-Living

For me living in a community only works when I have my privacy and freedom alone and with the man I love. We luckily have our own tiny home, but I still have moments I feel unfree as there are people around every day (this sense of unfreedom is mostly in my head). One day a week, on Mondays, we don’t eat together with the community and do our own thing. Mostly, on this free day, we stay in bed longer and we have banana pancakes, Meke coffee and nice conversations together, just the two of us. I love these moments.

Last Sunday I felt so suffocated by being around people, cooking and eating with them and this whole place and our new Mallorca plan, I needed to escape and I went for a long walk in nature. I thought about the new plans and about living in a community while passing by the patient trees in the forest.

The plan is to rent a 4-bedroom house with a plot on Mallorca together with some friends. Dorus and our friends start building simple tiny homes of pallets for students who come to our new place to do our Sustainable Living Course, which Dorus now teaches at Casita Verde on Ibiza. The place will be a new kind of Casita Verde, not with volunteers, only for students who pay to follow the Sustainable Living Course. These students will stay in the tiny homes on the land. Later Dorus will build a tiny home only for the two of us, so we will have our privacy back again.

I thought long and hard and I realised this housing plan makes me feel unhappy, regardless how great these friends/future community members (who are all single) are, it made me feel uncomfortable to live all together in the same house. Moreover, what kind of effect does it has on my relationship with Dorus? I’m not quite positive about this. It will only be temporarily, but surely for a year or more and that’s long. During the end of my walk in the forest, guided by the old trees, I got the answer loud and clear: I won’t force myself into this new housing plan if it doesn’t feel right to me. Suddenly I was able to breathe again. It seems we both have other wishes for our future, other needs. He is a community person in heart and soul. I am not; not in the way it is here at Casita Verde. These last weeks I clearly have noticed that I appreciate my space and time alone and with him to stay a happy and healthy person. This definitely could be within a small community as long as we have our own privacy.

In the meantime we will enjoy our last months on Ibiza in our tiny “eco wagon” home, made by Dorus. I will miss this sweet place and island. But I’m also looking forward to see our friends on Mallorca who are so generous and sweet to let us (and our two cats 🙂 stay with them for the time we don’t have a place yet. He is the reason we moved to Ibiza in the first place! Now we will follow him again to Mallorca. I can’t wait to discover more of the Balearic beauty! Still, I don’t feel our new adventure is all kittens and rainbows, but together we are strong.

In the previous post I shared the mystical story of the Selkie-woman. The reason why this story resonates with me, especially now, is that it shows me to stay true to myself and my dreams. Many women find some recognition in this story – and I believe especially those women who are mothers (respect to mums and also the mums who have their own dreams and goals!).

Next week we have Dorus’ niece, partner and their little girl over from New Zealand. They will visit us for five days and will be our new neighbours here for a little while. Now she will finally see how uncle D. has turned into a hippie.

Con Amor,

Eva

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Eva is a Dutch writer based on the Balearic Islands (Ibiza). She has created this blog EVALUNES to share her writings about the things she cares. She writes with love. Con Amor. Always.

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